Building Bridges That Last
A few ways to start positive conversations - and keep them going
When Maya started her new job, she noticed something right away—people weren’t really listening to each other. Conversations were transactional. Meetings felt like monologues. Even simple interactions at the coffee machine were laced with impatience or awkwardness. But Maya, a firm believer in the power of connection, made a quiet decision: If I want to see better communication, I’ll start with myself.
She didn’t launch any formal initiatives or send out company-wide emails. Maya just changed how she talked—and listened—to people. Within weeks, something shifted. Her team became more open. Fewer misunderstandings occurred. Even the grumpiest coworker began to smile a little more.
So what did Maya do differently? She practiced five powerful ways of positive communication—principles that can be used not just in the workplace, but in families, friendships, and everyday life.
Want to improve your relationships? See if any of these suggestions can help you become a better, more effective communicator.
Learn to listen in order to understand what's being said, rather than offering a vague response - Most people listen just long enough to prepare their next comment. But Maya fully engaged in listening. She made eye contact. She didn’t interrupt. She asked questions like, “Can you tell me more about that?” or “How did that make you feel?” People began to notice, and they responded. Real listening made them feel heard—and feeling heard makes all the difference.
The takeaway: Let people finish their thoughts before jumping in. When someone senses you’re genuinely curious, they’re more likely to open up.
Use “I” Statements instead of pointing fingers - When a deadline was missed or tension filled the room, Maya avoided blame. Instead of saying, “You never updated the team,” she’d say, “I feel out of the loop when I don’t know what’s going on.” The difference? It shifted the conversation from confrontation to collaboration.
The takeaway: Express your feelings without accusations. “I” statements take responsibility and reduce defensiveness.
Keep your tone in check - Maya understood that how you say something often matters more than what you actually say. So she maintained an even tone, rather than raising her voice. If she became frustrated, she took a breath before speaking. Her calm demeanor created a safe space—one where people felt comfortable being more open and honest.
The takeaway: Tone is a mirror. If you stay calm and respectful, it’s more likely the other person will do the same.
Practice appreciation out loud - Maya believed in giving credit generously and genuinely. “Thanks for taking care of that so quickly,” or “I really appreciate your attention to detail,” were part of her daily conversations. Recognition didn’t just boost morale—it built trust.
The takeaway: Never underestimate the power of a kind word. Positive feedback strengthens relationships more than criticism ever will.
Learn when to be quiet - One afternoon, Maya saw a colleague, Jordan, staring at his computer, clearly upset. She sat nearby and asked, “You okay?” He nodded but didn’t speak. Instead of prying, she simply said, “If you want to talk, I’m here,” and let silence do the rest. Within minutes, he opened up—not because she pushed, but because she gave him space.
The takeaway: Not every moment needs to be filled with noise. Sometimes, simply being present speaks louder than words.
Over time, Maya’s approach began to ripple outward. Others began to mirror her communication style. Team dynamics improved. Conflicts became easier to resolve. And something deeper happened too—people started to feel like they mattered.
Positive communication isn’t just about being polite or efficient. It’s about seeing people as human beings—with hopes, fears, and stories. It’s about building bridges, instead of walls.
As Maya quietly proved, one thoughtful conversation at a time, the way we speak to others can shape not only our relationships, but the very culture around us.
It all starts with one choice: to speak in a way that builds connection instead of creating distance.
In health & happiness,
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Jill Reid is the author of Real Life, Discover Your Personal Truth, Life in Small Doses, and Please God, Make Me A Writer. Her books, videos, and newsletter explore life, relationships, self-improvement, health, and personal success strategies for working through the challenges of everyday life.
