The Tug to Go Home Never Leaves You

The deepest of human connections starts with you

Nov 05, 2024

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Home.

That simple four-letter word holds the power to change lives — the kind that can erase your fears, calm your nerves, and settle your restless spirit.

In conversations with friends and strangers alike, I’ve learned that a sense of “home” means different things to different people.

Some people describe “home” as a place they currently occupy — a physical structure where they keep their furnishings and clothing, where they sleep at night, and eat their evening meal.

Within a constructed space, they’ve become comfortable in their daily routines — patterns of behavior for existing within the confines that contain them. They surround themselves with things they can see and touch — belongings they interpret as proof they are “home.”

For some, this may be true — and enough to assure themselves they’ve quieted the fear of being disconnected from others.

In reality, they’ve allowed their emotions to be lured to sleep in semi-hypnotic acceptance of “good enough.” This dulling mindset subdues their desire for meaning and attachment to something or someone they can put their arms around.

But for many people, they’ve recognized that cluttering their lives with tangible trophies is nothing more than a distraction keeping them from facing the empty void in their hearts.

Deep down inside, they know something is missing.

They are not happy, content, or at peace. They do not feel whole and complete. They drift through the motions of life a day at a time, feeling separate, disconnected, and alone.

With little to excite, motivate, or inspire, they choose to avoid the truth: Their physical environment isn’t enough to bring them true joy.

These feelings are often too hard to face — or change. And many settle for a life of mediocrity and empty regret.

So what does it really mean to be home?

I’ll tell you what it means to me. Maybe you can relate.

Being home has nothing to do with the four walls and roof that contain us.

It has nothing to do with surrounding yourself with material possessions or turning your new car into the last driveway on the left and parking in an oversized garage.

Being home has nothing to do with where you keep your clothes or take a shower or watch TV.

It is not a transitory answer to a deeply soulful question.

For me, being home in your heart and soul and mind and body is the result of the connections and relationships we have with the people in our lives who truly matter — those we want to be around, talk to, cry with, hug, laugh, and sing out loud with.

It is feeling free to openly display our deepest emotions, reveal our biggest dreams, expose our most anxious fears — without conditions or restrictions or judgment.

This exhilarating mindset — feeling at home — has the power to put your cautious mind at ease, drop all barriers, and relax your inhibitions.

It is an intangible nexus of love and trust.

We all want — need — to be loved.

We want to feel that warming emotion deep inside — that safe and secure flame that spreads light and joy despite the troubles and worries in our lives.

We long to be connected. We crave a sense of release — the freedom to jump and play with abandon.

We want to be home.

Yet we often remain uncertain and on edge, intentionally ignoring the emptiness inside and avoiding the tug at our hearts that simply won’t let go.

So what’s preventing us from pushing our fears aside and finally shedding our overly-protective skins?

Consider this …

The intrinsic connection with home starts with the relationship you have with yourself.

Without first accepting who you are — trusting and believing you have the ability to be authentic and congruent in your life journey — there will always be a mental and emotional barrier preventing you from being free to experience this deepest of human connections.

Loving yourself comes first. Accepting yourself comes first. Recognizing your truth and bringing your values and beliefs into alignment comes first.

Being at peace with yourself is where you start. Then listen to your heart, and let its wisdom guide you home — wherever that may take you.

In health & happiness,

Jill Reid

Jill Reid is the author of Real Life, Discover Your Personal Truth, Life in Small Doses, and Please God, Make Me A Writer. Her books, videos, and newsletter explore life, relationships, self-improvement, health, and personal success strategies for working through the challenges of everyday life.